Grand Canyon and Train

Disney World

There is 1 thing you should NEVER mess with (well I'm sure that there are more but I am upity now!!!)...

Normally I am a pretty light person (in relation to humor and tenor of my thoughts. Not when it comes to gravity as in weight. I am not delusional) but I have hit my limit. I have had enough of this stupid election. I have decided to do what I can to teach and protect my family and wait patiently with my gun for the second coming.

What has brought this on (you ask)? I have listened to the rhetoric and watched the mud slinging. I have cowered in fear of Michelle Obama and frozen in disbelief at the miss match of the McCain’s (she is an easy 81/2 with all that money and he is teetering near a 5). I have listened and heard nothing again and again in the boring liberally slanted debates and heard enough about Palin’s wardrobe (she looks fabulous by the way). But when they continually preempt my prime time TV I really get ticked off.

It was bad enough when they did it with the debates, but that was a national thing where both parties got equal time to make me long for Canadian citizenship. But now I have to sit through Obama’s 30 minute commercial!!??!

This Wednesday on CBS, NBC, and Fox Obama has bought the 7 to 7:30 time slot for his 30 minute commercial. I thought he wasn’t an actor, why is he messing with my viewing schedule? I am sick and tired of taking political and life advise from attractive high school drop outs that can’t stay married for more than 2 minutes and don’t know who their baby’s daddy is whose only true ability is reading someone else’s words while mugging for the camera (I mean actors). I watch network primetime because I want to go numb and live in someone else’s world for just a little while. Why is Obama trying to rob me of that joy on top of my right to have a gun and the ability to keep and spend my own money? I just want to laugh and veg.

Admittedly, Wednesday is a weak night on the boob tube but it is the principal of the matter. When I want news, I watch at 5pm. When I want entertainment, I watch at 7 pm (unless I am in one of those funny places where things air at 6 and 8 and up is down).

So I declare, here and now that, because of the continual TV disruption (and the fact that he is a grossly under qualified, semi-socialist with loyalty and ethical issues, that is intent on blaming the current administration and his opponent for problems brought about by his party, constituents, and the current Democratic congress, who solves problems by raising taxes, coddling the minority, and indentured servitude to China), I am voting for McCain/Palin. I will also be watching ABC who is showing Pushing Daisies instead of the purchased brainwashing drool. I further intend to buy everything that is advertised during that first half hour and I will purchase 50% of my Christmas presents and all of my children’s Halloween costumes at The Disney Store (Disney owns ABC).

I know that not all of you will share my passion on this subject but I tend to take it personally when you go fiddling with my Prime Time viewing schedule willy nilly. He is just really lucky he didn’t choose Thursday for his little infomercial. The crap would have really hit the fan then.

Later. For Now Long Live Mickey Mouse!!!!

Can I get an AMEN? How about a big Cheer? OK, why don't you just talk amongst yourselves (I could use the distraction)?

It is 9:30 and my house is quiet. This is a phenomon (especially since the medicine cabinet wasn’t involved). I have a rare moment when there is nothing on TV and I am not in the mood for anything I’ve Tivoed (like how I just made that a verb and you all know what I’m talking about) when I can just sit and realize that the quiet kind of freaks me out.

I cannot be sure, but I think that I am allergic to quiet (there is probably a pill I could take for that). When it is quiet I feel like there is something that I need to do. Something that I am neglecting so I often go looking for it (maybe I should try to keep my house quiet more often. I might actually loose some weigh from getting up off the couch in my search).

Growing up in a house with 10 strong (and by strong, I mean really loud) personalities, I don’t know that I ever really knew quiet. That unaquantiance (if that is a word) continued on through college when I always had a roommate or two (if you count the horse) and never lived alone. Then I got married and started popping out little noise makers, and have effectively avoided contact with quiet all together. Even when we were in the same vicinity, I think I drove silence away (consciously or not) with the sound of my own voice (talking to others or singing. I have not graduated to talking to myself yet).

I am not afraid of the silence (they say the Spirit dwells there but, having always had noise, I think the Spirit is OK with a little mood music or background noise) but it is kind of sad and empty. I am used to the babbling of babies, the giggles (or wails) of children and, especially in AZ, the swooshing of the AC but there is nothing. I think I prefer the bustle, simply because I soothes me. Maybe I just like to feel like I am not alone (I am never alone but when it is quiet in my world there are usually 4 kids doing something they are not supposed to be doing which means there will soon be an abundance of work for me) and I am comforted when there is sound. I can’t even sleep in the silence. I need a noisy Honeywell fan to create “white noise” (that might just be to block out the whispers of children that refuse to fall asleep until well after the old fogies in my house need to retire).

It is weird, but I have never really thought of the quiet. I have thought about most everything else (because I have a large brain that never seems to turn off) but since I have never known quiet, I have never thought about it. I used to associate it with peace but I have known peace and quiet is not it. But, in this quiet, I have realized that people have their own truths.

Some believe that a clean house equals a happy peaceful house. That is a big steaming load of crap. My truth is that a clean house equals an uptight and grouchy mom and the eternal banishment of potato chips. Some people think that cluttered equals messy but that is also a fly attracting mass. In my world cluttered equals life, progression, and 3 kids in school who bring home heaps of papers and “art” every day. There are also those who think that rising early is a great way to start the day. In my world, you could die if you get to close to me in the morning before I have decided sleep has left me for good. Especially since I have only been able to shut my eyes for 10 minutes because I have 5 nosiy children bound and determined to make their lives harder by keeping me up all night and waking me up right after I have fallen asleep in the morning. These are the truths I have realized in the quiet.

Oh thank goodness. There goes the AC. I am off to watch last week’s The Office.

Looking For A Comfy Corner of the Loony Bin (and maybe a some cute Scrapbook page ideas)

I think that it is well established that I have a few problems. No your normal run of the mill everyday problems (I mean I have quite a few of those as well but that is not the type I am talking about) but real deep seeded emotional/psychological problems. Those of you that know me are thinking, “Well Katy we have known that for a while now. What’s your point?” But I think that I could surprise even some of you die hard Katy supporters.

For starters, I just re-realized that I have a very addictive personality. I’m not into drugs and alcohol but it is evident in other areas of my mundane life. I have a Tivo with 165 hours of memory and I spent an hour this morning deciding what must see program I could sacrifice to record Diego for my 3 year old so that he would get in the bath without a screaming fight. I have 165 hours of shows, some of which have been recorded since July and are still waiting to be viewed, and I couldn’t find one program that I was willing to delete for my baby. In the end I busted out the VCR (Do any of you remember what those are?). We are not even 2 weeks into the prime time premiers and I have a solid weekend of nonstop TV to watch so that I have room without a panic attack. I really believe that my life might implode if I miss even one episode of the Biggest Loser (Save your comments). I know that most networks put episodes online so I can watch them there but not The Biggest Loser and when you have repressed fears about being a super fat person trapped in a chubby lady’s body, it is dangerous to miss even one minute (It could push me from chubby to tubby and I can’t go there right now. I just bought a new pair of jeans). Another example issue is that I have managed to fill up half of my new external hard drive (250Gigs filled) with digital scrapbooking kits. I just keep downloading and downloading. I can’t even stop myself. Don’t get me wrong, I have made quite a few really nice pages, but 12 or 15 cute pages doesn’t require 250 G (or GB. I hope that most of you understand that to mean Gigabytes) of crap. I am not exactly sure how much crap that is because I don’t really know a ton about computer and electronic information measurements of volume but, from the way my husband reprimands me, it must be a ton of junk.

I am also pretty sure that I have OCD. Not a ton, just a little. If you have ever watched me fold my laundry you will understand this claim. I am the type of enterprising person that sells things on eBay to earn a little extra money (that is not the problem). What makes me crazy is that once I have it listed, I sit and watch it for hours knowing, in my brain, that nothing is going to happen. I don’t limit my obsessive watching to the last few minutes of the auction either. I start at the beginning (darn those visit counters. Notice I put one on my blog. I am a glutton for punishment). Some of you might not think that this is crazy but it has spread. I am in the process of selling my house right now. Yesterday we had a couple come and look at it. I left the house to make them more comfortable to take their time. I had a ton of errands to run and not enough time to get it all done so you would think that I was off doing that. No. We crazies sit in our cars parked up the street so that we can get a look at the strangers walking through our houses and see how long they stay (a nice looking older couple in an Audi with Idaho plates that stayed for 30 minutes). Yes, I sat there for 30 minutes watching (thank goodness for DVD players in cars). What is wrong with me? Not that it all has to do with crazy non-stalking that looks like creepy weird stalking. I also cannot relax when I know that every light and fan in my house is on. I once tried to leave and not worry but I had to drive the 15 minutes back to my house to turn everything off and then go back 15 minutes to the store (I am counting the time it takes to get my kids in and out of the car and then stop for a big gulp to calm my nerves). It is just another something that us crazies do.

My current living situation has just managed to exacerbate my issues. I can already feel the building anxiety that I have let my pantry and freezer get so low. Just writing about it makes me fidgety.

Deep Breath. Deep Breath.

I hope that this has not scared any of you off. I am a good person but even good people are crazy (I know most of you so don’t even bother denying it). All I know is that the nutty need to stick together (I am in no way intending to offend those with peanut allergies.) if we want to survive.

Have a nice day.